Tim Keller

One of the principles of love- either love for a friend or romantic love- is that you have to lose independence to attain greater intimacy. If you want the “freedom" of love- the fulfillment, security, sense of worth that it brings- you must limit your freedom in many ways. You cannot enter a deep relationship and still make unilateral decisions or allow your friend or lover no say in how you live your life. To experience the joy and freedom of love, you must give up your personal autonomy… For a love relationship to be healthy there must be a mutual loss of independence. It can’t just be one way. Both sides must say to the other, “I will adjust to you. I will change for you. I’ll serve you even though it means a sacrifice for me."

"The human heart takes good things like a successful career, love, material possessions, even family, and turns them into ultimate things. Our hearts deify them as the center of our lives, because we think they can give us significance and security, safety and fulfillment if we attain them. Something is safe for us to maintain in our lives only if it has really stopped being an idol. That can happen only when we are truly willing to live without it, when we truly say from the heart: “Because I have God, I can live without you”. 

conundrum...

I'm sitting here trying to study but instead wondering why I'm studying anatomy and sciences when there was never any desire in my life to go into this field.

A lifetime of pursuing art seems to be going down the drain.
sinking slowly
this Good Friday night.

Am I being selfish by wanting to quit? By wanting to pursue my first love in creating, sharing, inspiring?

Or should I finish this program leading to a very stable yet creatively uninspring career of being a speech pathologist.

Am I not seeing the bigger picture clear enough?
Is it my attitude?

Is it the fact that I'm a generation X kid who needs to pursue my passions instead of following in my hard working parent's footsteps and placing passions aside to support family?

I feel barely any motivation to study.
Is it hobby versus career?

If I choose to pursue my passion, will the response be welcoming?

Why haven't the doors been open where I wanted them to be? Or did I just not try hard enough?

This is not what I wanted or planned. But could it be what I just have to suck up and do?

I danno either.

btw, hello again blog...